It bothers me when I’m not productive.
For the last two weeks, I’ve spent my days off pretty much doing nothing: didn’t work out much, didn’t write, all that jazz. I felt like I needed a break, at least a slowdown from exercising, but that feeling didn’t make taking a break easier.
How can laziness be easy and hard at the same time? It’s easy to slip before catching yourself. It’s painfully hard to maintain laziness but also hard to stop eating kettle chips on the couch all day. Being lazy is easy and hard, in all the wrong ways.
A mountain of excuses emerge after having been dismissed for so long: it’s okay, it’s winter; it’s only a few days; I deserve it; everything is so hard; what I’m doing now is ACTUALLY productive. . . in a way, sometimes.
At some point, is it better to sit back and enjoy it?
It’s no coincidence I sank deeper and deeper into the couch just as I hit a wall with a video I’m editing.
Maneuvering around these pitfalls in life can only go on so long, but I believe there’s a sliver of a moment where you have the choice:
Laugh or Cry.
Sit or Stand.
Close your Eyes or Open Them.
From that moment on, it gets harder and harder to let yourself go the other way. You’ve already made the choice, and the choice was hard. If you’re not quick, you’ll choose the path of least resistance, but maybe that’s not always the best way to go.
I’m not saying to always second guess yourself, or to not be spontaneous, but inside yourself, you always know what the right decision is. Also, inside yourself is a different side, waiting to envelop you in mind-numbing vegging.
The worst part is that THAT part is sneakier than you. Because it knows you, and it knows how to hide.
Sometimes it will catch you and turn you off your feet.
That’s just how it goes.
Here’s the secret to beat it, almost Every Time: Start & Try.